Slam! Music Reviews That PWN

[HecticArt]

That made me go to Youtube to listen to it.
It'll take a while to listen to it all.

I HAVE to know.

I've listened to a little more than 3/4 of the album, and it's just generally uninspiring.

It's a little hard to explain, but it's kind of avant-garde, jazzy, chill stuff. It's calculated/scripted, but has the feel of free-form jazz with a moody euro-bebop female vocalist. (Bebop may not be the right category for the vocals, but I can't come up with the genre.) It has a vinyl record needle crackle that runs over the top of the whole thing that I find unnecessarily distracting.

It may be kind of pretentious and self-indulgent, but it's mostly just uninteresting.

I have some early Stereolab that I used to listen to a little regularly, but while this doesn't have that appeal, it certainly isn't worth the vitriol and rage.

The reviewer seems like bully that is taking more joy from trying to come up with mean things to say than actually trying to say anything meaningful.

 

[scotchandcigar]

This is a short, but insightful observation by Pitchfork, of Benson Boone at Coachella:

I say all that to say that Benson Boone is horrible, just godawful, the kind of act that makes you wonder if this whole medium has been worth it. His main stage set, at 7 p.m. on Friday—a preposterous slot for him—was nine absolutely insipid originals that seem designed to soundtrack tearful front-facing confession videos followed by a galling (and inexplicably Brian May-assisted) cover of “Bohemian Rhapsody.” I didn’t love it.

 

[sadchild]

"makes you wonder if this whole medium has been worth it"

Wow, a performance that makes you wonder if music should even exist. That's about as harsh as it gets!

 

[sadchild]

"Alex in NYC" remembers his review of this album back when it came out:

I remember penning a cheekily snide one-sentence review for a tiny music `zine about the album that spawned that single "Praying For Time", the eye-rollingly titled Listen Without Prejudice Vol. 1. My review was simply: Listen without purchasing.

 

[sadchild]

Ok it's not music. But it's music-related. I'm listening to Stern 1/22/2003 and they're talking about a movie starring the American Idol winner (Kelly Clarkson) and the runner-up (Justin Guarini). These reviews are too brutal to not share!

From Justin To Kelly:

Entertainment Weekly film critic Owen Gleiberman wrote in his review, "How bad is From Justin to Kelly? Set in Miami during spring break, it's like Grease: The Next Generation acted out by the food-court staff at SeaWorld."

Time magazine described the film as "a monstrous Idol movie musical that in the most generous light is the worst film so far this century".

 

[Channel98]

We highly sophisticated DRC members recently voted The Sound Of Music as the second-best movie musical (behind Mary Poppins). Writing in the New York Times on March 3, 1965, the day after the musical premiered at the Rivoli Theater in New York City, critic Bosley Crowther wrote that The Sound Of Music was "adapted from a quaintly old-fashioned book" (Maria von Trapp's 1949 memoir, The Story Of The Trapp Family Singers) and "is always in peril of collapsing under its weight of romantic nonsense and sentiment." He criticized the children's "artificial roles" – whatever that means – and called Robert Wise's direction "cosy-cum-corny."

 

[sadchild]

It's like Booey calling the iPad "a bit of a stumble"