Channel 9: Show 4


Well-Known Member
Oct 12, 2008
Another classic episode, filled with great guests and hilarious filmed segments. The show started off with a parody of the latest controversy in the media; Roseanne Barr butchering the 'Star Spangled Banner'.

From there the show went through its opening montage and into Howard doing Sternac. The answer to this question was, "Push 'em back, push 'em back, waaaaayyyy back!"

The question being, "What do the recent letters to Channel 9 say about Boy Gary's teeth?"

Howard brought out Richard Simmons and Richard brought out gifts of flowers, balloons and song. Howard made a quick play for Richard's tight workout shorts and Richard pretended that he was going to leave. Richard wanted to talk about his gifts. In this picture he tells Howard, "It's a poodle made of "mum's".

Howard wasn't that interested in anything Richard brought out, he wanted to ask Richard about his latest video, "Sweatin' To The Oldies". He thought it was strange to see the fella dancing next to Richard(the man in leather was superimposed into the video).

Howard then played another section of Richard's video, the part where a woman is shown barfing up her "deal a meal" food after exercising too hard.

Seeing the woman barf prompted Richard to react thus.


Well-Known Member
Oct 12, 2008
After Howard was finished tormenting Richard with doctored video, he was ready to have Richard bring out two of his success stories from his diet plan. Howard kept referring to them as "Richard's fat friends" much to Richard's dismay. And of course, Howard was ready to break their balls by breaking bread. Here he tempts them with a full bag of Lay's potato chips.

And here you can see the full chicken that was dropped from the rafters.

And here's a YouTube link to the scene.


Howard came back from break and played a filmed public service announcement that made fun of Ed McMahon and his reported dalliances with Starsearch contestants. Billy West played Ed McMad.

Ed McMad asked the home viewer, "Are you ready to get to meet a wine soaked second banana?"

Ed inside a hotel room grading the talent.

Howard brought out Young MC and asked why rap artists hate white people and if he bangs white chicks.

As it turned out, Howard already knew that he bangs white chicks because the next person he brought out was his ex-girlfriend and part time stripper, Amy Lynn.


Well-Known Member
Oct 12, 2008
Howard tried to get under Young MC's skin by showing Amy Lynn fully undressed with Howard while inside a limousine.

Howard even showed himself on stage bringing out Amy Lynn to a room full of horny bastards from Jersey.

And although Young MC tried to act as if he was mad, all seemed good in the land of Stern. Now seemed as good a time as ever for a group hug.

After coming back from break, Howard and Robin went through a few news stories. The first news item was the controversy surrounding Roseanne Barr's version of "The Star Spangled Banner".

Howard thought this controversy was much ado about nothing. Howard actually seemed annoyed by the hype surrounding the story. He wondered whatever happened to everyone's sense of humor.

Robin then played video of, as Robin alluded to, Roseanne's boyfriend/manager. At this point the name of Tom Arnold was not on everyone's lips. Howard cynically remarked on Roseanne's sex life, "How can any man lie next to her in bed?".

In the Tom Arnold clip, Tom was very animated and was making crazy gestures to the people in the press room. He wanted people to be removed, especially those belonging to gossip rags. Howard wondered, "Who has more class, him or her?". Robin also played video of George Bush signing the 'Disabled Rights Bill'; Mario Cuomo's bid to make dwarf tossing illegal; and a story about a person claiming to be a doctor that apparently gave gynecological exams to women.

After the commercial break Howard brought out Stuttering John to show his latest celebrity interviews. John started off with a pretty strong interview with Paul Harvey. While asking Paul questions, John would pause for long intervals, like Paul does during his news feature. I'm not certain that Paul got the joke, but he certainly became apprehensive after a few minutes, so he left the interview short and decided to not give the Howard Stern show a shout out as per Stuttering John's request.

The second interview was with Frances Bergen, the wife of famed ventriloquist Edgar Bergen and mother to Candice Bergen. John asked her questions about if she was ever sexually attracted to any of Edger's dummies. Frances was very cool about getting asked these types of questions, she was a good sport. Howard wondered what type of helmet she had on her head.

Howard ended the show by bringing out Felix Cavaliere from the Young Rascals. Howard kissed his ass with praise and got Felix to play the song "Lonely Too Long". Robin and Howard joined in on the backing vocals and Robin was really grooving to the song. Howard stepped up his game and sang decent backing vocals with Robin.

After the song ended, Howard brought out Amy Lynn and Young MC in hopes that there would be some controversy or fireworks, but nothing that dramatic happened. Howard got Felix to play "Good Lovin'" over the credits.

A very good show. Although the story has been mutated over the years, people still talk about the time Howard tempted two heavy set people with meat dangling from the rafters. This is the show when it happened.